Resources for Military Spouses

Here you'll find all the information you'll need to get help if you are thinking or have decided to separate from your (abusive) Military Spouse.
Please bear in mind that these Charities are NOT independent, they will always side with that the Military/your spouses regiment wants doing. 
Advice is given to you by current or former Army wives. Different branches will have different charities. 
A more in depth information sheet will follow. 
You don't need to follow or believe it. 
But it's there for those that need it. 
AWS
Army welfare Service 
They won't do much apart from help with emotional support. however, they are MOD run and won't be impartial. 

The British Legion 
The can help with moving into a new house, extend your current time in SFA, food vouchers, new furniture, white goods, schools etc. 
SSAFA
They have the same support available as The Royal British legion, tend to be more slower to help. 
You are entitled to 93 days in your current SFA, there have been cases where the wife could choose where to have her 93 days. DO NOT USE THE COTSMORE CENTRE FOR THAT!!! 

Your Rights 

1. You have 93 days AFTER he has changed his/her Pstat ( personnel status from married to separated) to stay in your SFA. under normal circumstances your ex will be moved into the block. 

2. the day you split, is the day you apply for Universal Credits & Child maintenance agency. It will take up to 3 months if he is cooperative, 6 months if he is not. 

3. ask your welfare to set up a letter confirming you live in the SFA, what the rent payments and CILOC ( council tax payments are), this will pay for the rent for the SFA. 

4. If you are staying in your current SFA passed the 93 days, make sure your ex partner will do his/her march out on your day 93.
Up until that day your ex spouse is responsible for ALL household bills (I will update with with exact link on JSP) 

5. on day 93 you call up your gas & electric supplier and register as a new client. 
Your ex is responsible for gas & electricity payments up until the 93 days. 

6.Should your ex spouse be abusive, make sure you contact Center for Military Justice, the civilian police and the RMP. I know the police will probably ignore it, but it will help eventually if it is reported. You need to remember, your friends now, might not be your friends in a few days, weeks, months. and you need to cover yourself asap. 

7. Pinnacle/Amey whoever your "Landlord" is, will start eviction process, its not as scary as it seems, it is not unheard of for ex wives to be in an SFA for 12-24 months after separation. The Military will never throw you out on the streets with children! no matter how much the regiment or your ex is trying to scare you.

8. When you find a new place to move into, you don't need to worry about paying for it. Your last move, as a separated spouse, is paid for. 

9. Remember, you are responsible for that SFA if you decide to stay beyond your 93 days. that include insurance & march out. Insurance is very important, you are responsible for the first 10K if there is a house fire, tree falls down etc. 

 

Financial abuse 

Unfortunately. the Military isn't the rich and luxury lifestyle living, most people think it is. 

especially to if you are a stay at home mum & don't "make any money". 

Financial abuse is very well known in the Military. Talks have been given and campaigns gave been out "raising awareness" but as always fails to deliver. ]

You can contact any of the above charities if your Military Spouse is not given you access to any money. Your Unit Welfare officer should also be contacted and informed. 

LOA 
(local overseas allowance)

When you are posted abroad your Military Spouse is paid an extra allowance for himself, you and any children. 

The LOA is based on your current posting and can be looked at here 

The LOA is to pay for any attentional costs being abroad & to cover some of the lost wages that the spouse could have lost as most postings wives cannot work & locals are favoured. This is YOUR money & YOUR CHILDRENS money. If he is withholding money, you have no access and need to ask. then it could be that you are in a Financial abusive relationship. 



Rent is also significantly less, anything between £0 to £250 depending on rank & house grade. 

Gas & electric is also taken directly out of the wages & is a flat rate. 

NO military personnel pays for water 

Overseas postings also don't pay for CILOC ( council tax) 
If you are consistently "skint" you are either REALLY bad with money or you need to ask some questions! 


Bullying, harassment & SA 

It happens everywhere right, you see all over my comments that it happens on "civvi street" or its the usual "I've been in the army 28 years and you're talking crap", they love to ignore the other 500 comments though telling their own stories on bullying, clique behaviour or assault. 

They also love the dismiss stories in the newspapers and just say there are " bad apples in every community" 

Read that and understand that you wont be helped, google cases, and you'll be shocked on how common this is, the results all the same. The bullies get supported, promoted & the victims of it get bullied by more people. 

you can either hire your own Lawyer that specialises in Military cases ( most di no win no fee) or you can contact the Center for Military Justice for free and truly impartial advice.