Why This All Started (The Real Version, Not the Polished One)

I’ve written about this before, but usually in a way that makes it sound more organised than it ever actually was.

So here’s the real version.

Dope Soul Village didn’t start as a business idea.

It started because I needed to leave a domestic violence marriage.

Simple as that.

No branding. No strategy. No “vision board moment”.

Just survival.

I needed money to get out. That was the original goal. Not empire building. Not “community creation”. Just: how do I leave?

And the honest answer is - I didn’t make money quickly. I didn’t magically build something overnight. I went through years of trying, failing, rebuilding, trying again while still living inside chaos.

Nothing about it was clean.

Nothing about it was supported.

The police didn’t really help in the way people assume they will. His family didn’t care. And I still remember calling my own brother minutes after my husband threw me on the floor and kicked me in front of my daughter.

And he sniggered and said, “what do you want me to do?”

That’s not something you forget.

And I haven’t spoken to him since.

That moment tells you everything about what “support systems” actually look like sometimes when you need them the most.

I was alone. Properly alone.

And as a neurodivergent woman, I kept hearing this word “village” thrown around - this idea that women are supported, held, surrounded.

I didn’t see it.

Not once.

My ex husband - I’m going to say this plainly because I don’t believe in sanitising abuse - was an abuser.

Angry. Controlling. Always the victim in every situation. Nothing was ever his fault. Ever.

No accountability. No stability. No real friendships or support system of his own.

Just blame. Constant blame.

And that becomes the environment you live in without realising how abnormal it is until you’re out of it.
You adapt to it just to survive.

Then came the house fire in April 2025.
My house burnt down.

At first, I genuinely thought it might have been him. That’s where my mind went immediately, because that’s the level of conditioning that happens after years in that kind of relationship.

But he had an alibi.
Two fire inspectors later confirmed it was an electrical fire.

Then things got complicated because it was MOD housing, and suddenly the narrative shifted around in ways that didn’t make sense. At one point it was electrical, then it wasn’t, then there were claims involving arson and a child who wasn’t even in the property at the time. None of us were.

It became one of those situations where you stop trying to make it logical because the shifting versions of events don’t allow it.

You just deal with what is in front of you.
And while all of that was happening, Dope Soul Village was also struggling.

Marketing agencies couldn’t generate sales. Nothing was converting. Money was tight. Energy was stretched. Life was not “building a brand”.

It was just… pushing through.
But I still knew something.

I knew women supporting women wasn’t just a phrase people used online.
It was real.

It just needed somewhere to exist properly.

And eventually, something shifted.

Women started selling on Dope Soul Village. Women started moving away from platforms like Etsy where fees and systems were eating into their work. Women started making money directly for themselves.

Not for a platform.
Not for a middle layer.
For themselves.

And slowly, it stopped being just my project.

It became a village.

A real one.

Not a metaphor. A functioning ecosystem of women building, selling, supporting, and surviving differently.

And now it’s evolving again.
Because Dope Soul Village is no longer just a marketplace.

We are actively moving towards opening domestic violence shelters.

Real spaces for women, children, and pets to leave unsafe situations and rebuild without being rushed, judged, or pushed back into survival mode too quickly.

We are also working on legal support pathways for women navigating abuse cases — because leaving isn’t just physical. It’s legal. Financial. Emotional. Systemic.

And everything we’re building is designed to support that full process.

Not just the moment of escape, but everything after it too.
This didn’t start as inspiration.
It started as necessity.

And everything that exists now exists because I refused to accept that the support I needed didn’t exist.

So I built it instead.